Wednesday 23 November 2011

4 Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills and find a date.

Have you ever been to a function in a room full of strangers and found yourself lost for words? It can be a very lonely experience, especially if you intend to date.

The art of introducing yourself to others and creating small talk may come naturally for some, but most people confess to feeling shy, embarrassed and don’t know where to start. Your inner ambitions are crying out for you to relate to others – just as other people are deeply interested to know you.

The key to knowing where to start is to understand the four levels of communication.

1. Small Talk
When you meet someone for the first time, the safest place to start is to talk about surface issues. For instance, make a comment about the weather, current events or the surroundings you are in.

This is called “small talk”, and is used to “size up” the other person to determine the comfort zone between the two of you. There is no need to disclose any personal information with the other person at this stage, as this initial interaction assists you to determine how “safe” they are on your first meeting.

If you are comfortable engaging each other at a surface level you can easily slip into the next level of communication: fact disclosure.

2. Fact Disclosure

This level of communication is slightly deeper than small talk in that you disclose facts about yourself without triggering topics of emotional interest.

The purpose of fact disclosure is to find out if you have something in common. You can use these common areas to build a bridge of friendship later on. You may want to talk about your career or occupation, hobbies, where you live, etc.

Avoid topics like marriage and divorce, politics, sex and religion in this second level of communication. With a little creative thinking, and the use of open-ended questions, you should easily find a topic that interests you both.

If you find a topic of mutual interest then you may progress to the next level of communication: sharing viewpoints and opinions.

3. Share Viewpoints and Opinions

Once you have established that the other person is “safe” through small talk, and have found areas of common interest, you can build rapport by sharing your opinions and viewpoints.

By sharing your viewpoints and opinions you allow yourself to become vulnerable to the scrutiny and objections of the other person, so you would only enter this level of communication once you were comfortable that you both share positive feelings through the first two levels.

Some people give an opinion about politics or religion as their starting point at this level. But you may firstly want to comment on the things you have in common that you found through fact disclosure. This is a safe place to start.

Be prepared to listen to the opinions of your new friend. It is just as important to listen to their viewpoint as much as you expect them to listen to yours. This will enable your friendship to survive.

Make sure you don’t use your opinions as a form of “character assassination” of other people. You may be thought of as a negative person and this may cause your new friend to distance himself/herself from you.

Over time you will learn to find a safe distance in your communication levels, and if you are forming a bond of friendship you may eventually enter into the fourth level of communication: sharing personal feelings.

4. Share Personal Feelings

Only solid friendships survive time to enter the fourth level of communication. After building upon trust, finding things in common and listening to the viewpoints and opinions of others, you may be able to share your personal feelings.

This is where an acquaintance becomes a genuine friend. You know that despite having differing opinions and viewpoints you can trust your friend’s judgement, and may go to them for advice.

Things of deep value to you can be shared without feeling threatened. You listen closely to each other without the need to “solve” your friend’s problem. You are happy to reflect their feelings back to them – forming a bond of empathy and compassion between the two of you.

At this level of communication, it is important that you provide a little distance between yourself and your friend. If the distinction between yourself and your friend becomes unrecognizable, it is possible for your relationship to go sour. If you know how to handle your own feelings, attitudes and behaviors while maintaining your friendship at this level, you will build a successful friendship that can last a lifetime.

By using these four levels of communication with prospective 'dates' you will find that they will become interested in you and want to get to know you all the more.

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Sunday 20 November 2011

Amuse-Bouche - Find Out About This Hot Trend in Entertaining

Amuse-bouche is becoming the hottest trend in foods and entertaining. If you enjoy offering your guests interesting fare that always gets raves you should consider learning about the seduction of amuse-bouche.

WHAT IS AMUSE-BOUCHE?

The word amuse-bouche is a french expression, literally translated "mouth-amuser". And no wonder - amuse-bouche are snappy, single bite creations which combine intense taste sensations in an artistic form.

Amuse-bouche is different from your typical hors d'oeuvres. It is most often offered when guests are seated at the table. Amuse-bouche not only offers guests something to taste while waiting for the dinner, but also sets the 'flavor' of the evening. The amuse-bouche should compliment the dinner as well as give guests a sample of the quality of the meal to come.

WHAT CAN I MAKE FOR AMUSE-BOUCHE?

Amuse-bouche concentrates on flavor; often combining simple, intense flavors alongside rich, multi-faceted ones. The focus is on savoring and appreciating the full flavor of a single bite; much as you savor the intensity of a shot rather than having a full cup.

The amuse-bouche can be a combination of bite size, single ingredient bites arranged artfully on a plate or a combination of flavors offered as one serving on a Chinese spoon. You may also choose a rich, flavorful soup (such as vichyssoise) presented in a shot glass along with a spoon.

The key to a good amuse-bouche is quality ingredients. Whether you're offering simple mandarin slices alongside a savory salmon mousse or a skewered shrimp with a complex marinade, you will want to use the highest quality and most decadent ingredients you can obtain.

PRESENTATION

Second only to quality ingredients and full flavor is presentation. Amuse-bouche follows the French tradition of artistic presentation. Find amuse-bouche ideas online and take note of the visual presentation. While not complex, the resulting impression is one of style and attention to details. Garnish sparingly and preferably use a simple white plate for optimum presence.

If you are so inclined you may wish to entertain your guests with a variety of amuse-bouche at an evening gathering rather than simply a prelude to a sit down dinner.

You may also choose to compliment your amuse-bouche with a well chosen wine. Some recipes will indicate a suitable wine or you can base your selection on the dominating flavor of the amuse-bouche.

There are several fine recipe books to guide you as you begin exploring the pleasures of amuse-bouche, but let your creative spirit shine as you take inspiration from the simple pleasures of flavor and entertaining and create your own unique 'mouth-amusers' for your guests.

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Sunday 6 March 2011

Listening To Elvis Presley Saved My Marriage

Listening To Elvis Presley Saved My Marriage



Our relationship was going through a very difficult time. She was accusing me, I was accusing her, we argued with each other constantly. We had been so very happy together and madly in love ever since we first met, but for some reason, in the last couple of years, probably due to work commitments and various other things, we just seemed to grow apart.



I wasn't having an affair with anyone and I am sure she wasn't either. Anyway, neither of us had the time any more, that was the problem, time! Then one day, on an odd day, I found time to relax while the house was quiet and empty. She was out shopping and I just decided to do absolutely nothing except chill out and listen to some music. I used to listen to music all the time. In fact, one of the most enjoyable things we used to do together was cuddle up in front of the fire and listen to music, maybe with a glass of wine or two, and kiss and cuddle like teenagers. But that seemed such a long time ago now.



Anyway, I had a look through the dusty music collection and found a few elvis albums. The first track I played was "Heartbreak Hotel" which didn't do much to lighten my mood. The next track was "Love Me Tender" and I could certainly relate to the lyrics of that song. Then I played "Suspicious Minds" and the words of this song really sank home. "We can't go on together, with suspicious minds"!



The more I listened to the songs of Elvis, the more they seemed to have a deep meaning to my present problems. The next song was "Are You Lonesome Tonight" and as I listened, my eyes started stinging, tears welling up inside, I was really getting emotional, which is something I never do, at least not while listening to music. As I sat there playing through my Elvis collections, every one of his songs seemed to be speaking directly to me. I could imagine some of the pain and upset Elvis must have gone through when he lost Priscilla. And as I continued to listen and compare my relationship problems with the problems of Elvis and Priscilla Presley, the next songs that played were "Got a Lot Of Livin' To Do" and "Teddy Bear". It was those last two songs that made me decide there and then to do something to save my relationship with the woman I loved. And yes, I still loved her and I was sure that she still loved me. All we had to do was get our priorities right. So from that day on, I worked fewer hours and spent as much time as possible with the woman I loved. Our relationship was eventually repaired and we rediscovered each other.



All of this because of and thanks to Elvis Presley. Thank you Elvis, thank you for helping me hang on to my own Princess, my very own Priscilla!



Elvis has not quite left the building! He lives on in our loving relationship!



Elvis Presleys songs and music are full of feeling. Every human emotion can be found in his songs, from "Gotta lot of livin' to do" to "Suspicious Minds" Listening to Elvis can certainly pull at your heart strings! http://elvis-presley.ok2b1.com



Source: http://www.submityourarticle.com



Permalink: http://www.submityourarticle.com/a.php?a=161069

Friday 25 February 2011

Over Sixty Dating For Seniors

Not all that many years ago, people were considered quite old when they reached the age of sixty. In the past, those over sixty would be swept under the proverbial rug, that's no longer the case. Now, more seniors than ever are staying fit and active.

Add to that the major advances in nutrition and medicine and people are having a high quality of life as they get older. When compared to previous generations, senior citizens of today are much more vibrant and vital. But what if you are about that age and are looking for a romantic partner? To put it simply, over sixty dating can be a rewarding and a very fun experience.

According to Wendell K. Cribbs, the renowned internet author and relationship expert, no matter how old we are, dating and relationships are vital to a happy personal life and positive mental attitude. We need to foster intimate relationships, in spite of any anxiety or fear, and regardless of our age. In fact, the majority of the feelings of hesitancy are not based on fact or actual experience, but are rather contrived within their own mind.

To paraphrase Cribbs, he goes on to say, "Over sixty dating isn't something anyone has to be afraid of. To be sure, senior dating can be both fun and exciting. As we near retirement age, many of the problems faced by younger people that are dating are not much of a concern for seniors, if they are present at all. Choosing a career, starting a family, and many other issues just don't get in the way. That's one of the main reasons why over sixty dating can be more relaxed and not have as much pressure attached to it.

A sixty-six-year-old former office manager named Robert is happy being a part of the over sixty dating scene, but he didn't always feel that way. He explains that dating at 66 is more fun and has much less pressure than when he was younger. He further adds that he dated his wife for six years before they got married. And how things were more serious for them at that time.

They were happy and had good times together. When she passed away he said he wanted to "hide in my apartment" and had no desire to become involved with anybody ever again. But after about half a year, those close to Robert encouraged him to put aside his feelings of apprehension and get back into the social scene. 

Cribbs explains that Robert's case is similar to many of those who are new to over sixty dating. He adds that trepidation and nervousness will be there at some level associated with dating again. While they all have plenty of life experience, most of them have been happily married for many, many years. This can make things a bit unsettling at first.

All of this is reassuring for any senior that wishes to establish a new and potentially loving relationship through over sixty dating. As the poet once said, "life is how you make it", and that's true no matter how young at heart you are.

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